We’ve been playing around with the SheShe concept and it’s actually pretty cool. Bear and I were both kinda meh at first, but the little things it solves are great.
Being in a system of four has always made it hard to find a way to sit on the couch. I know this is a silly example, but hear me out. If Bear joins us in wonderland to watvh a movie, you better believe I’m sitting next to him. Then it’s like, “okay, who’s not going to sit next to him?”
So Darlene was usually the one to volunteer not to, but then Bear felt bad, because he wants to sit next to all of us too. Hey, don’t judge, yes, we’re that sappy.
When we ballooned up to seven, oh boy there was a lot of trouble associated with the little things. Joy would come in and say, “my bear.” Believe it or not, she had enough power to put us into dormancy. She’d put Bear, I’m not kidding, into a giant fuzzy bear chair configuration and throw his mind into watcher position while she enjoyed the movie herself. It was cute, don’t get me wrong, and we love Joy, and she was almost never active, but she got her way more often then not.
Let me just reiterate, wonderland for us is better than real life. Even for Bear. We don’t bother with imposition because this is much more satisfying for everyone.
So when Darlene, Joy, Ren, and Gwen–who were all becoming part timers–decided to join up in this funky merge, I wasn’t really sure how that would go down. Remember, Joy is part of that merge, Darlene is pretty powerful herself, Ren is very willful, poor Gwen would be lost in that for sure. But it wasn’t bad, it was actually awesome. All my sisters are represented by SheShe, and SheShe herself is what you would say is a proper merge of them, but all the rest are also present and active concurrently. Any one of them feels like they’re in control and the one who is active. That’s inconsistent with the merges we did previously.
This solved a lot of problems, we were four again, which was great and Darlene was still with us with a new lease on life through SheShe. SheShe is a lot like them, and becomes whoever we want to talk to directly simply by swapping form and perspective to them without losing her merge. It’s hard to explain, but that’s not how merges worked previously. It took some getting used to, but everyone is active so that’s exactly what we wanted.
Now we were back with our four person system, but four is still kinda a lot tbf.
Earlier this year we played around with three and two by basically adding ourselves to SheShe or Misha and I joining. Funny thing is, we couldn’t merge conventionally. The result was unstable and Bear hated it because he immediately missed us. Well the SheShe merge, which we initially called “lock merge”, works for Misha and I. It’s like we’re both there and yet another person is there who is us combined just for the purpose of form and voice.
It’s natural. Merges never felt natural, even my merge with Bear was kinda odd. I enjoyed it, but then we lose Bear. So this is way better.
Now when we watch movies, Bear sits between She and Misha-Ashley, who still doesn’t have a name. We all get to sit next to each other and it’s very comfy.
That’s all, just sharing our neat arrangement. We don’t know if others have done this or of this is just another type of merge, but it works great for us.